Life for me has been pretty routine of late. Library, meals, showers, sleep, placements. That's all I do, but then again, exams are pretty close, in about a month and a give or take couple of days. I'm actually getting quite nervous about exams approaching so soon, since I heard it's like EOS 5 and OSCE in IMU. Not something I would love to go through again, the number of panic attacks it gave me last time.
But I guess it's different this time, being away, taking a major exam in a totally foreign country with none of my usual study buddies or family to just pray with me. It's gonna be extra tough but that also means I've got to be even tougher! So studying in the library for 12 hours a day won't be as fun without people from IMU, so everything will seem tougher when I don't understand something, but I'm sure I'll make it through this time, just like every other time before this, because whenever I start losing hope in myself, He never loses hope in me and surprises me beyond my wildest imaginations just like He has for every exam before this.
I've just got to continue to have faith in Him and commit everything into His hands. I'm saying all this now while I'm still sane from studying, maybe in a couple of weeks, if not days, I'll start going crazy doubting why I'm doing medicine, questioning God and all, but well, hopefully reading this post and remembering all that He's done for me would continue to fuel me on this long journey ahead.
It's not easy. But hey, anything worth fighting for is never easy, is it?
xoxo, elvyna.
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