Mine.

And at the end of the day, it'll always still be you.

xoxo, elvyna.

Mine.

At this moment there are 6, 840, 507, 003 people in the world. Some are happy, some are sad. Some have lost, some have found. Some are at war, some are at peace. 


Six billion people in the world. Six billion souls.


Sometimes, all you need is one.


xoxo, elvyna.

The story of Boo.

Once upon a time, there were a bunch of bears in IKEA. Cute, big, fluffy giant teddys (well, not so giant but huggable-sized ones). 

Then one day, the boy bought me one and the rest is history! Lol. What a short story, I know. Well, Boo is sort of the best gift he's given me (not saying I don't like the piano or the watch) but Boo is so cute I just, I don't know. He's so soft and cuddly I've fallen asleep on his head (using his head as a pillow) a couple of times already. 

I also brought him on board with me (people can stare all they want!) in my flight back home from the UK and boy oh boy, I slept a full 8 hours without waking up at all! (might have something to do with the pills I took but let's put that aside). Adorable giler! Ahh. This is like such a random post but oh well, random is sometimes good!

Signing off with pics of Boo and I when I just got him! He was much softer then compared to now due to excessive hugging (:

Boo and I.

xoxo, elvyna.

A Valentine's to remember (:

Went to London to celebrate Valentine's day this year. First time celebrating it really. It was really fun going for a mini trip like that. Had lunch at Royal China in Bayswater, which was one of the recommended places in London to go to for Dimsum. They served really good dimsum to be honest, but the portions were small-ish and it was pricey :/

Disclaimer: Picture quality kinda sucks cos I was using my digital instead of DSLR. Felt it was too heavy to lug around in London the whole time :/

Char Siew Cheong Fun! Ordered two of these (:
The usuals.
The tastiest (and also priciest) eggtarts I've ever tasted in my life! The pastry was golden browned to perfection and each layer crumbled and melted in the mouth! (:
Glutinous rice wrapped in leaf (:

Had dinner at Koffman's at the Berkeley. Its not a Micheline star per se, but the head chef is the guy who trained loads of now Michelin-starred chefs around London. My aunt recommended we went to this place so we did. And boy, did it not disappoint! (:
Us (:
Lovely bread selection. Garlic brioche was totally my fav (:
My starter: Terrine of Foie Gras with baguette and brioche.
His: Langoustines and scallops with shellfish broth.
My main: Home-styled, braised beef cheeks in red wine.
His: Pig's trotter stuffed with sweetbread and morsels. (The chef's specialty! Totally recommend it) (:
My date (:
Dessert: Pistachio souffle with pistachio ice cream (: (The fluffiest souffle I've ever tasted! One of their specialities as well)

All in all, it was a great Valentine's celebration, and I think I've gained 5kgs more after that one day meal in London. Oh well, well worth it I'd say (:

xoxo, elvyna.

Agape.

This video made me cry for the longest time ever.

I don't recall the last time I watched something that moved me so deeply like this video did. It made me remember a lot of things. His love. The feeling it gives me. The understanding of the Father's love in giving His only son to die for me, for us. Reflecting on everything He's done, His love, His mercy, His grace. Who am I that I am the object of His affection? Why me?

"That God in eternity looked at me forseeing my fallenness, my pride, my sin. I want that man in my family. I'll do anything to get him in my family. I will pay for him to be in my family with my son's life."

I will love You with every breath, every song, every word, every action, every cell in my body because You are God.

xoxo, elvyna.

Touched..

Because today I found out that sometimes you can continue loving someone just by praying for them everyday.

xoxo, elvyna.

What if Your blessings come through raindrops?

Love.

What does it really mean?

"Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

I haven't written about love in a while. Feelings, yes, emotions, yes, but not love. I've always felt love is such a strong word. It embodies so many things as depicted in the bible verse above. Yet, it is being used loosely by people everywhere. I'm not judging people who use the word love, don't get me wrong, but I'm just saying to me, it means a whole lot more than a four-letter word.

Speaking to a friend today about relationships, I reflected on what LOVE means. I think I'm still on a journey to discover its meaning. I mean, I know I love my family and friends, but the kind of love it takes to be in a relationship and make it last, I'm not sure if I know how it feels like. Maybe I've loved before and am afraid to do it again, but one thing I know for sure: for now, knowing the love Jesus showed me when He died upon the cross to be my saviour, that would suffice. That love? It surpasses any kind of love I know I'll ever get from anyone in this world.

Thank You for loving me (:

xoxo, elvyna.

Confrontations aren't my forte.

Words cannot express what I'm feeling right now.

The overflowing emotions and thoughts, all scattered in my brain like pieces of a puzzle that have already been poured out but haven't been put together yet. How do I even begin putting the puzzle pieces together? I haven't seen the end product before, I don't know how it'll look like- would it be pretty? or would it be ugly? Do I really want to know what the outcome of it is?

Whoever said: "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me" obviously had no experience in life. Words DO HURT. ALOT. Especially when they're displayed out there for the whole world to see. It feels as if every single word pierces the flesh like a sharp knife, causing me to bleed away but not enough to die yet. That's how I felt reading it.

I felt so ashamed reading it, somehow trying to get my head around the false accusations you were making about me, but I couldn't understand why you did it. When I was reading it, I was concious that probably about 100 other people may have read it/were reading it/were going to read about it, sneering and laughing away as they realize that I was the one you were talking about.

Tell me, how is it "love" if all it brings you is heartbreak and despair? And how is it fair if it is not reciprocated?

All I know is, you shouldn't have fallen in love with me.

Nothing's ever going to be the same again.

xoxo, elvyna.

Waiting for Forever.

One of the sweetest films ever. So beautiful. Love the soundtrack so much and Tom Sturridge is looking pretty hot (:

Definitely a film I'd recommend (:

xoxo, elvyna.

If we loved again, I swear I'd love you right.

So I'm doing Palliative care starting this week for a week. Done with my Medicine block after that. I can't believe it has been three months since I started. So what have I learnt so far after being posted in Elderly care, Gastroenterology and Cardiology wards? Well, not much theory to be honest, but I certainly did learn to talk and communicate more with patients. To hear them out, even if it's about other things not related to their disease or treatment. Makes one realize they are human too, with their own stories of life, with their own family. It's a really humbling thing to listen to them. Made me do a lot of self reflecting and made me appreciate things/people around me more.

Talked to a patient the other day and we ended up talking about the World War which he fought in, and his family, and his values in life. I somehow related to him and he taught me a few things as well. It's amazing, I wonder if he knew, that he touched my life that day when I talked to him. I'll remember the things he said to me for a long time now. Some reasons why I love medicine: you get to meet people, see things, learn things. It's all a learning process, and I'm ready, like a sponge, to soak up if people are willing to teach. You don't just learn from the consultants or registrars on the wards.

Ah well, enough with my boring talk. Just thought I'd like to share how I feel after being in the hospital for 3 months. Well, that ends Winchester postings for me. Next up, Southampton General Hospital. Hopefully the doctors are friendly and willing to teach as well.

On a separate note, no one said life was easy. Heck, it's a roller coaster ride. But then again, when I've got a rock as strong as Him to hold on to, what's there to be afraid of? I take comfort in that every single day. On days when I feel so weak, with no one to turn to, with family so far away, I know, I know I can always turn to Him. He'll never fail me. He's not just another human, not just another friend who disappoints, He's my God, my everlasting Father who understands and holds me in the palm of His hands because I'm his precious daughter.

So amazing this grace that He shows. I'm forever grateful. Gives me a reason to smile and be thankful everyday (: Gotta stay strong and persevere.

xoxo, elvyna.