Time can't erase a feeling this strong.

I cried today. *sigh* I was just so pissed and angry I couldn't take it anymore. The tears just started flowing after that, but just for a while. I always wonder why God created me like that. Why can't I shout at the person who made me angry like any normal angry person would do? Why can't I scream and stomp off or raise my voice like I should? But NO, I just cry when I'm really really angry. There's something really wrong with the way I express anger :(

Why was I THAT angry you ask? Long story which I don't really want to repeat cos' it'll just make me feel sad. Anyways, I figured something out today when I was angry. That as much as I love and care for the people around me, it's time I stopped caring so much. It's time for me to start loving myself back. I've realized that for the longest time now, I've just been giving, giving so much of myself- my time, my efforts, my emotions,etc. to so many people. At the end of the day, I'm left with nothing much for myself, and where does that leave me? All emotional and depressed and too tired to love and care for myself.

So here's the deal. I'm gonna stop caring so much and start loving myself more. I mean, I guess until I really learn how to love myself, who am I to love others right? Well, that's just my take on it. Life's lessons man. Sad but true. (I already sound so selfish saying this) :(

Anyway, here's a quote I kinda like:
Love is like a movie – you cannot dislike a wonderful movie with a bad ending – it’s just not possible to feel sad and angry about the bad ending if the rest of the movie felt like a dream.

xoxo, elvyna.