Just got back from Kajang today. Grandpa looks so different. So thin, so fragile. I felt so useless just watching him that way. Saying a little prayer in my heart for him made me feel better, but did it make him feel better? He was talking to my brother about church and stuffs. Asking bout' my religion. I should've been there. He keeps talking bout' how he wouldn't survive for very long. Saying his "time" is almost up. Does he know how much it hurts me to hear those words? I've got to hold back the tears everytime he starts talking about these things.
He overstuffs himself with food, saying he's got to enjoy while he can, knowing that by doing that, he'll just vomit back out everything he's just eaten. It really sucks to have a total gastrectomy. And now, the doctors are suggesting he does chemotherapy but my uncle wouldn't allow it saying my grandpa's too weak and wouldn't be able to make it through the process :(
The doctors found that the cancer has metastasized to his lymph node :( OMG. DAMN you cancer. seriously.
Just get out of the lives of people I love.
xoxo, elvyna.
September 22, 2009
And I want you to know, you couldn't have loved me better.
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1 comment:
yes, cancer sucks dear.. we rebuke and we have to leave the rest to God. your grandpa is in my prayers dear :') *hugs*
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