Failure.

So I'm in the midst of my final exams now and I've just finished the practical side of my exams a couple of days ago and it was soo bad. I know I always tend to say exams are bad and be upset about it but this was seriously the worst I've ever felt after coming out of the examinations. It didn't hit me then but when i got home and got to bed at night it just sank in and I cried my eyes out. Literally sobbed myself to sleep on my wet and drenched pillow.

I have nightmares about my OSCE exams every night now following the exams but during the day I try my best to focus on revision for my writtens which are going to happen next week. I really pray hard I will pass and not have to resit the whole year just because of one exam but I really, for once, don't have any form of confidence that I will pass this exam. I really screwed it up real bad. It was a really stupid mistake but it will cost me a lot.

Really need a miracle from Him in my life now. Please God, Please. I don't want to redo the whole year again. I just NEED a pass.

xoxo, elvyna.

Heavy.

Tonight I write with a heavy heart.

How did things end up the way they did? What happened? Can you ever get too used to something/someone? I know it won't always be rainbows and butterflies but its just stormy and shit now. It has been for a while.

I really can't be asked to do anything about it now since exams are just next week. Setting my priorities right.

xoxo, elvyna.

Stress

Exams are in two weeks. Feeling stressed but somehow not as stressed as I should really be. And studying everyday is really getting to my head. Getting agitated easily and pissed off over the smallest things. Sigh. Studying makes me a monster.

Just wish it would all end real soon and I'll be a legit doctor soon. Please help me get through this last hurdle God!

Alright, that was my study break whilst I ate a banana. Bye!

xoxo, elvyna.