All that I ever wanted was to see you smiling.

Visited grandpa in the hospital today. He's concious but in pain still.

The first thing I noticed about him was the amount of weight he's lost since the last time I saw him. That, and also the numerous amount of tubes that are connected all over from his arms to his neck. So he had a total gastrectomy plus splenectomy on Tuesday. I really thank God that the surgery went relatively well although the cancer had spread to adjacent organs. And also the fact that grandpa is recuperating well in ICU. He talked to me when I visited today. Showed me his surgery area and all some more. Like some little kid proud of his scars or something :D

It was a heart wrenching sight but I said a little prayer before I went in to see him asking God to make me strong and not break down. It worked. I guess I really get all emotional when it comes to family members cos' they really mean a lot to me :/

Oh. And I had the best night ever today. Everything was just right (: Thank you so much. You don't know how happy I felt (:

xoxo, elvyna.

somewhere we went wrong, our love is like a song but you won't sing along, you've forgotten about us.

Went to see the doctor today. Right external auditory meatus (that's in the ear) is swollen and oedematous. Pain's radiating to my jaw. Makes opening my mouth to chew food hard. sigh. This is NOT good :( And to add to all that, I've got 3 different kinds of pills to take- antibiotics, painkillers (side effect: GI disturbances), therefore, gastric pills. sigh. and ear drops too :( Doc says I shouldn't blow my nose as well. Good thing I've got no running nose.

I think i emo more easily when I'm in discomfort or when I'm sick. I'm not supposed to be feeling this way. But the conversation I had today with a friend, made me think, ALOT. I dont know if that's good or bad but I know I shouldn't really let it affect me. I should make my own decisions, call my own shots. But one thing he said which struck a chord in me was how much you'll actually want to spend time alone with someone you like. Every moment you have that you're free especially when time is what you're up against. *SIGH* Guess friends are funner to be around with? :S

I don't know. STOOPID ear pain, GO AWAY. Then the emo-ness will go away too :(

xoxo, elvyna.

White chocolate kisses underneath the stars.

So I'm back. I've never been more chilled than now. The whole trip was so relaxing, stressless and mostly, FUN. Pics will be posted up soon here or FB. (FB's making me angry cos it doesnt wanna upload my pics) >=/

Anyways, will start blogging again come next week. Chilling weekend I suppose. Birthday party to attend and church and that's about it. LOL. Slow paced life. Kinda boring at times though. Not complaining though. I think.

Hospital postings start on the 3rd of August. Scary? Better read up on some stuffs before going so I won't look so stupid :(

Wanna do a french manicure, anyone free to teman? gimme a call (:
*just another excuse to go out* :P

xoxo, elvyna.

Life's a beach! *no pun intended*

Dear readers,

I'm leaving on a holiday! Finally a proper holiday after my exams. Though it's nowhere far but at least, a getaway from KL. So yes, I'm leaving this weekend and coming back sometime next week. No plans yet, if I enjoy my hols, I'll stay longer! haha. So relaxing when I don't have to worry bout' travelling. Take care ya'll! Enjoy your hols! (:

Sun, beach, sand, chill (:

xoxo, elvyna.

This post was inspired whilst I was in the shower. weird, i know.

This world is a broken world. Ok. That was random. But yea, just something the guest speaker who came to my church last week said. He also said that if you want perfection, die, as nothing on earth is perfect. I totally agree with this. hmm. So yea, it's been a rather slow paced holiday for me, but amongst my group of friends, many things have happened. It's really a tough thing to face especially when you hang out with the same group of friends in which the scandal and problems are happening :/ Sucks more when you're the middle person.

You know what I think bout everything? It's all a matter of choice. Every single thing you do in life, is based on the choice you make. You choose to get into a relationship. You choose to end it. You choose to love someone. You choose to stop. So when shit happens and things go wrong, who's there to be blamed? YOU. yes, You. *sigh*

I think people nowadays lack sincerity and honesty. We are living in a world where people are so fake and not genuine. I think being genuine is the most important thing. To be real when you talk to people, when you make friends, when you do anything whatsoever. If you put your heart in it, even if it doesn't work out, you know you've given it your best. Why would anyone want to be someone or something they're not? I really don't get that.

And that's why you have marriages which fail, relationships that don't work out because of cheating partners, misunderstandings in friendships. All because we lack sincerity. I don't know what I'm talking about, really. But if it's any worth, I think that all this fakeness should stop. I really want to know people for who they are, the real them. Not the façade they put up just so people will like or accept them. Just be who you are. People will appreciate it, at least I know I will.

I pray God that You'll change this world and make it a better place, but first of all, change me and make me a better friend and person to people around me.

xoxo, elvyna.

Post End of Semester results!

I really really want to thank God from the bottom of my heart. My pulse racing ever so quickly as I was tearing along the perforated lines of my result slip. My eyes frantically searching for the grades that would determine whether I make it to Semester 4 or not. The gush of relief I felt when what I saw was not what I expected. HE really works in miraculous ways. Beyond anything I can EVER imagine. And once again, He has blessed me abundantly in my studies. You are so awesome Daddy! (: Love you to the max! haha. Your grace is sufficient for me. Keeping faith (:

Another thing, Youth Rally in church went well this weekend. Thank God I could still worship lead though my throat was hurting so bad plus the cough and leaking nose that wouldn't stop. Thanks to my worship team too for helping me out so much. You guys rock! Everything worked out well. See? He's amazing no?

Told you so :P

xoxo, elvyna.

~Oh Lord, you've searched me. You know my ways. Even when I fail you, I know You love me.~ There's no greater love than this. <3

Small gathering at Shing's.

Had a small potluck/dinner/gathering at Yaw Shing's place in vista last night. And by small, i mean, small (: only 5 of us. Anyways, I brought cupcakes. Heh.
So Jon and Shing were in charge of cooking the main course. Fishes for everyone but me (: haha. They're really good cooks I must say. Yaw Shing especially. LOL. So yea. lazy to explain, just see pics that i've edited la.

I set up the table! :D





Ended off the night playing Pictionary and Taboo. FUN! (:

xoxo, elvyna.

7.9 out of 10.

Feels so nice to finally bake again. After soooo long. Anyways, did Red Velvet cupcakes again. But I think this time I'll call it Chocolate cupcakes. Why? Oh, cos' I forgot the lemon. LOL :P Anyways, this time round, I made it an effort to actually 'ice' the cupcakes properly. Therefore, more effort!! Heh. Was quite happy seeing the results.
Very meng-happyfying-kan (:

What should I make next?

xoxo, elvyna.

Dates that freak me out :( :(

10th July : EOS results day.

28th July : Grandpa's operation day.

I pray God that everything will be fine. Your will be done, not mine. Your ways are higher than my ways, Your thoughts than mine. I pray for the strength and courage to make it through these obstacles in my life. I trust in You. So great is Your unfailing love. Lead and guide me through it all.

xoxo, elvyna.

You're the only one who makes me sing.

Holidays are AWESOME! (:

Watched SAW chapters 1-5. Brilliant plots and storylines. It's like my new fav horror movie! I think it's a little gory though. But don't care, I really like it! (ok, for those who've watched it, i might sound like a crazy sadistic person-_-). Can't wait for the 6th one! or more, if any (:

Plus, I'm loving the holidays cos' I get to go out with people I love ♥
It's a very warm and fuzzy feeling. I'm so glad to be yours.

All the cute things you do simply tickle my heart.

xoxo, elvyna.

random.

Mei Xin and Kor Woi cutting Jon's hair one day before OSCE exams. I helped cut his fringe! :P

xoxo, elvyna.

Be grateful. Appreciate.

Who are you? I really don't know anymore. Everything anyone says, if you don't agree on it, you have to fight back, you HAVE TO start a "war". When are you going to grow up ? Stop being so immature. It really is annoying and I'm reaching my limits. Before this, I never knew I had limits. Right now, I just feel so disappointed in you and who you've become.

It's time to grow up. Stop blaming every single freaking mistake in your life on others. Take the blame when it is your fault. Learn to be grateful with what you have in life. Appreciate before it's too late. I hope you're reading this. I really don't know how to communicate with you anymore. It always turns into an argument. And I don't want to argue with you. I'm sick and tired of your excuses. Give me a break :(

xoxo, elvyna.

P/S# Thank God my grandpa accepted Christ last week. It truly is amazing how God works in His mysterious ways. I was so touched when I heard the news. Now I hope everything's going fine and doctors will give us the good news. Hey, at least the surgery's postponed. Good sign right? Thanks for the regards and prayers to those who've been encouraging me. Thanks.

Cause it's too late, there's no escape, might as well face it.

I'm sorry for everything, I really really am.

xoxo, elvyna.

You took my hand, You led the way.

EXAMS ARE OFFICIALLY OVER TODAY!!!! (:

Finally. Felt like the longest time ever. Thought I'll feel free and carefree but I don't. This is weird :( I'm relieved it's over. That's all. Not particularly happy or contented. Maybe cos' I didn't do so well?! argh. Results are coming out next week.

Anyways, went out with Chee Leong, Kor Woi, Jien, Jon and Mei Xin today. Had Nando's Extra hot after centuries looong :) satisfied.

Then, we executed my idea of Mcd's ice cream and extra ingredients ! (: Look how they turned out. Very yummy too! Watched Ice Age 3. Funny movie. k then. better catch up on some sleep before I can truly enjoy my holidays! Nites (:

xoxo, elvyna.

I'm almost there! (:

Today marks the end of three days of exams. Had OSCE today. Clinical skills exam. Didn't go too bad I think :/ Anyways, i was quite satisfied after doing it. Heck, it sure beats Monday and Tuesday's KILLER exams :( Hope I pass those.

So tomorrow's the last day. LAST DAY! woot (: OSCE again. Hope things'll go as well, if not better than today.

I figured out what to do at my rest stations today. Pray (: Helps a lot.

xoxo, elvyna.